How to Know if Your Drive is Turning into Driven
“Drive” is important. It is the motivation to progress, to accomplish, to produce, to excel. Nothing ever happens without drive. God made us to “be fruitful” but that doesn’t mean that crops will grow by themselves.
“Driven” is dangerous. It wrecks relationships. It turns to envy and road rage. It damages health. It forces us to perform rather than fulfilling us when we perform.
How do you know when you are being driven?
1. You don’t care WHO gets in your way or gets left behind.
A “driven” person only sees the end in mind. Anything, or anyone, between them and the goal becomes an obstacle!
The secret of success is to motivate others to accomplish goals together. Nehemiah motivated each person to “build their section of the wall.” He made it collective, plural, mutually beneficial. Who wants to cross the finish line alone?
2. You find yourself obsessing over others who have achieved more than you.
A “driven” person only sees his competitors. Instead of working simply to please the Lord, they FORCE themselves to outdo their nearest competitor. Victory becomes about the joy of watching your competitor’s disappointment when they lose.
Do you need to win in order to be validated? Can you enjoy the process as much as the prize? Can you learn continually both from failure and success? Life becomes a joy when you are fulfilling your purpose…without noticing how others are doing.
3. You find it hard to live even with yourself.
A “driven” person becomes miserable. They discover that in times they are supposed to be “relaxing” they are cranky, irritable, impatient, argumentative, and unpredictable. The “drive to arrive” makes every little roadblock and minor detour a major setback.
Become self aware. Why do simple setbacks make your pulse and blood pressure go sky high? Why are you uptight when everyone around you is relaxed? Decide that there is NOTHING worth destroying your peace (or family) over.
WHAT CAN YOU DO?
1. LISTEN to those who love you.
Those who live with you, work with you, and play with you will tell you when they notice you have become “driven.” You need their feedback.
Even if it makes you angry, receive it. It may save your marriage, your health, your career, your children, and a host of other collateral damages that come from being “driven.”
2. LEAD with a sense of peace.
Shepherds know that they cannot “over-drive” their flocks or they become diseased, miscarry their babies, and become prey. The true shepherd walks in front of his flock and leads.
Don’t “over-drive” your friends, family, and co-workers around you. Let them walk and do life at their pace. They don’t all exist to help you finish your goals at a world record pace!
Like a pressure cooker, let off some steam. “Amp down.” Arrive alive. Apologize when your drive turns to driven.
Drive is good, driven is dangerous. Please, for your sake, learn the difference.