All tagged leader

4 Reasons Marriages Fail and How to Fix Them

For a lot of couples, Valentine season is a difficult time.  They celebrate one more year but inwardly they know their marriage seems to be failing.  Often, marriages that seem outwardly successful are privately failing.  How can you fix a failing marriage? 

Marriage failures usually come down to four main causes:

"Take Courage"

Here in Baton Rouge, the unthinkable happened this past Sunday morning:  three police officers dead and three wounded.  From Dallas to Nice to Baton Rouge, we are all on an emotional roller coaster of tragedy.

How do we cope?  Where do we find the courage to keep loving, keep forgiving, keep giving?  Jesus repeatedly told those in distress to "take courage."  It was a COMMAND:  "TAKE courage."  Don’t leave it laying on the ground, pick it up.

Here are a few ways you "take courage" when you are in a time of deep distress: 

Borders

The whole world is upset about borders.  From Brexit to the Middle East to the Ukraine, borders are shifting.  Some propose tighter borders and others want them totally removed.   John Kerry recently referred to a "world without borders."  Someone said that he left that speech, got into his armored car, anddrove behind the walls to his home! During the Katrina crisis, we had 900 people sleeping on the floor of our church. Visiting our church, President Bush remarked about a strip of blue tape we put on the floor between each person's private "space."  In nine months with Katrina evacuees we never had ONE fight.

Here are three areas I have learned to maintain proper borders:

 

The Danger of Haste

I hate cruise control.  I hate it but I love it.  But I hate it.  It is so limiting.   It requires me to go only at a certain pace.  I love it because I can relax and just ride.  I hate it because I want to get there ahead of the guy in front of me! In our world today, everyone is in a hurry.  Patients are dying in hospitals because of the haste to move on to the next patient.  Everyone is on the move.  We are squeezing every second out of one activity to pour into the next one.

Think about these things when you are galloping toward your next ferry that is about to pull out:

 

Four Secrets to Saying No

Stress is killing people.  Guilt is not far behind.  In between those two extremes is a simple word:  “No.”  Getting that word out is the hard thing.  We hint, we beat around the bush, we psychologize.  We stay mad because we couldn’t say that word.  We avoid certain people and events because we can’t say that word.  Business leaders, parents, pastors, and politicians all have a difficult time saying that word. Your world will change when someone shows you how to say “No.”  I’ve battled it for years.  After all, they’re my friend.  What if I ruin a relationship?  Didn’t Christ teach me to serve?  What if their reputation tells me that what they borrow will never be returned?  How can I add another thing to an already overloaded schedule?  Stress or guilt?

Here are a few helpers to help you get that word out: